Welcome to the neighborhood

I finally met my new-ish neighbors last night. After nearly taking Mr. Handsome out with a giant-sized coat rack as I not-so-gracefully rounded the corner on our outdoor stairway, we'll-call-him-Alex politely ignored my complete lack of coordination and introduced himself. The exchange went something like this:

Alex: "Hi! Are you moving in?"
me: "No."
Alex: "Oh."
me: "But I can see how you would think that as I've been lugging piles of stuff up these stairs for the last 40 minutes. I moved in in June."
Alex: "Oh!"
*awkward silence*
Alex: "June did you say?"
me: "yup."
*nervous throat-clearing and shuffling of feet*
Alex: "we'll-call-him-Jack and I just moved in like a month ago"
me: what I thought: I know. I watch you creepily through the peephole every time I hear a noise outside my door.
what I said: "cool"
*more awkward silence*
me: "Welp, see you around!"

Needless to say, I don't think I'll be invited over for movie night anytime soon. I imagine my relationship with Alex and Jack will go much the way of my relationship with the guys who lived there before them- namely, they carried my two-thousand pound sleeper sofa up three flights of stairs during the second-hottest South Carolinia June on record and then never spoke to me again. Maybe I should have baked them brownies.

Anyway, it's only thanks to my parents that I ever meet any of my neighbors, and lucky for me, mom and dad are visiting for a long weekend. Yes that means there are three of us co-existing in my apartment the size of a chest freezer, but I don't mind. Mostly because my morning went something like this:

-I woke up and thanks to my mother's prompting, actually got out of bed when my alarm sounded instead of my usual routine of accidentally hitting 'dismiss' when I meant to hit snooze and promptly falling back asleep until exactly 9 minutes before I need to leave for work
-My mom ironed my clothes while I made coffee
-My mom packed my lunch while I showered
-My dad drove me to work while I put my make-up on (note- I would have done this even if I had been driving, it just meant my fellow commuters were saved from imminent disaster via my total and utter lack of road skillz)

Yes I earned my first paycheck when I was 8 years old. Yes I own every cleaning product known to man and can clip your couponing socks off any day of the week. Yes I can change my bike chain, check my oil, and I do grown-upy things like eat off of place mats and buy housewarming gifts, but you better believe I love, love, love being totally spoiled by my parents and regressing to my 8th-grade self. And darn it all if my mom doesn't iron a mean crease on J Crew chinos.